We meet the surgeon

It was really hard to sleep last night as I tossed and turned trying to keep my thoughts under control... about as easy as curbing an active 2 year old. Part of me dreaded visiting with the surgeon and the other part just wants this over with. The part that wants it over with is the part that drags me into the car and drives me to University Hospital where I find parking and walk in a daze to the outpatient admitting. There is an older gentleman behind me that is being jovial and pleasant with me - a nice distraction in my 'busy' day. Bless him for his merry laughter as we engage in conversation... my turn.. back to answering in a soft voice not wanting to draw any attention. I am 45 minutes early and the Tim's is strategically placed near the elevators going up and I buy a coffee, sit down and commence another conversation with an elderly woman going to get her knee checked after surgery... another pleasant distraction as the time ticks by. I make it up to the 8th floor surgical ward and get help from staff to find the office I am looking for... the waiting room is eerily empty and remains that way until I get called in.

The nurse does the weighing and height and leaves me in an exam room waiting to see the Surgeon. I gaze out the window and have a great view of the east end of the city and the main doors to the hospital. From my vantage point, the day is beautiful with the sun shining and people out on benches soaking in the rays while a man in an overly large truck finds parallel parking difficult even with help from the guy whose van he is coming painfully close to. The decorative grasses are swaying in a breeze that makes even the flowers dance in their beds... Alone but distracted by the casual going ons in the world. People leaving with crutches, wheelchairs and cups of Tim's clutched in their hands... It could always be worse... the door opens...

'You don't look 45! exclaims the Surgeon as he eyes me close up and offers me a seat. I leave the comforting view of the window and return to the seat opposite him. He reads through the paperwork and then attempts to make a call to mammography... they keep mis-directing and then putting him on hold. He is not a man to bother with people who waste his time. He is talking to me now of procedures and is concerned about my young children. After a thorough examination he looks me in the eyes and says he would like to do the surgery as soon as possible and it will likely be a few weeks. He turns as he goes to leave and quickly closes the door then turns to tell me that he will do everything he can and as soon as possible. He has a few words with the receptionist who gathers up paperwork and stamps it with my new hospital card. She directs me to the Surgeon's secretary ....

I meet with the secretary, fill out paperwork as she begins the arduous task of shuffling people in an attempt to get me the closest date.. she looks up briefly and says - you are going to have your surgery on the 21st with a number of appointments in between to get you prepared. No chance of a cancellation, she says. She looks up briefly again and catches my eyes.. you will receive phone calls booking appointments, smiles for a second and continues to do her work as I show myself out... bye she calls out, good luck. I smile... it has been a day of kindness.

I make my way through traffic to Eileen's house.... we chat while I text out messages to all the people who need to know right away including my wonderful GP Annette... she texts back asking how I am dealing with all this... I am fine.... and strangely I am... and so it begins. I have a date and a week to prepare my family, my house and myself. xoxo